I know you guys were waiting for this! The moment to put the ladies in position to answer this life-threatening question. What this precious princess -sometimes with a dragon inside- really wants in the sexy department.
I think this is sometimes a matter of expectations. That has always been the eternal problem with us women. We build expectations. That's not completely bad. But it is bad for the between sheets moment!
The problem with expectations is that they are built based in fantasy, movies or your own fault. Yes, your fault, my dear friend! Probably you were sweetening her, telling her sweet promising pick up lines to just prove she made a mistake.
Don't "I'm the Titanic and you're the sea, tonight I'll go down on you" and then you just wait to choke her in your junk, without really sinking deep into her rough waters.
That thing of "roses are red, smurfs are blue. I don't know if I can, but I'll try to screw you". That should be your pick up line, so you could work up, instead of down.
If you managed to conquer a lady and made her your wife, the Mrs., let me tell you lucky guy, the worst is yet to come. Yes. The easy part was to make her say yes. The hardest is to keep that yes a YES! YES! YEEESSSS!!
Here are some tips to help you understand what we want about S.E.X. Because for us, women, sex is not only about the intercorse moment, but all the moments that guide us towards it. Sex is a woman's response to a happy, honest relationship. Sex is the culmination of been emotionally satisfied by the end of the day.
* Be honest. Don't expect your wife to be giving if you're keeping things from her. Say the truth. No matter how ugly it may sound, say the truth.
* Respect her. For us, women, is very important to know our husband is not a freaking pig that's giving cute compliments to every woman he sees. Is my cousin looking good today? Great for her. Is my old schoolmate looking gorgeous while pregnant? Great for her. We already give compliments to each other. Is so out of place you doing it. Oh, my sister is suffering because her ex broke her heart? We already told her she deserves better. Not your place to tell her she should look something better... like you. Not cool, man. Not cool at all!
* Is okay to be sensible. Sometimes. She knows you have feelings. Let them be seen. Tell her what makes you sad, be open. But, please, don't be the guy that always cries. A sensible man is sexy. A cry baby is a passion killer for women. If we wanted to be cleaning tears and buggy noses, we'll have a daycare.
* Don't hide your flaws. You think she hasn't noticed you are losing hair? She looks at you more than you think. Long time ago I had a friend. He was going bald and he wasn't even 25. He fixed the problem combing his hair from bottom up to cover the bald spot. Needless to say, Mr. Tumnus from Narnia could see it from there.
* Talk less, show more. Yes! Don't be saying all those nasty things you'll do to her, and then just be a sneeze. Not cool, my friend. Not cool! Try harder. And by harder I mean, breath and stop and restart.
* Give what you want to receive. Men are so visual that sometimes forgets his wife is full of desires as well. You want her to give a striptease and she hasn't? Take the lead, boy! Shake what God gave you! And then ask her to return the favor.Equity!
* Dress up your part. Men complain women spend way too much time getting ready. Don't blame her for not wanting to look like she just took off her cleaning apron. You cannot complain about something: she never goes out looking ugly. Put some effort and dress nicely for her. Plan in advance so your outfit is on point. We cannot erase that memory, so make it worth.
* Make her a priority. Every woman possess a different idea of how her man should prioritize her. Going drinking with the buddies or going drinking with your girl? She'll understand she's the problem if you always choose the buddies, the fishing, the gaming, and the responsibilities. And when you finally want her (for the nitty-gritty, she knows better!), she won't be available. She'll be hanging out with her girls as well.
* Take her out or take her in. -Be proactive in your marriage. Remember when you tried to make her fall under your spell? Ask her out. Or in, depending on the current situation. Plan an easy date for just the two of you. Details matter, but the intention matters the most. She probably don't care you picked a wine nobody drinks, or that you came home with a pepperoni and cheese party tray and redbox movie. I assure you, you'll get lucky just for trying. (Warning: Just make sure don't bring a Luvana movie without talking that one first!)
* Be the man. Open the freaking door, please! Is not a big deal. We can do it ourselves. But is way pretty when you do it. Plus, you give her the chance to flash you when she's leaving the car. Don't be fool.
*Don't try to change her. She likes her hair dark. Embrace it. Why trying to make her blondie against her better judgement? Don't go in there or she will start making investigative work until finding why blonde and who blonde.
* Compliment her. Tell her how pretty she looks instead of "What took you so long?". That's exactly the opposite reaction she's expecting. She took so long to look that good to you. Enjoy. Thanks!
* Look at her in the eyes. Nothing as intimate as having any conversation with a partner who can look straight into your eyes. Truth, honesty and love can be read. Nothing feels worse than talking something important but you don't stop looking at the floor, the door, that dictionary nobody uses, or the dead fly at the edge of the window.
* You cannot fix all her problems. Just as you have tons of problems that make entrance every day, she has her fair share of crap coming into her life. Don't get mad when she's frustrated. Don't blame her when she doesn't feel like talking. Maybe she just need a few minutes to chill until she finds a way to open up. You're not Sir Fix-A-Lot. Your wife is not expecting you to come in a huge Budweiser horse and shining armor to her rescue. She's already planning on her own. She just want to be hugged!
* Show her how she excites you. Be sweet and tell her how much you need her lips, etc etc.
As you can see, we women are such complicated beings. But if you learn your wife's right buttons, you'll be the best rewarded husband in human history. Learn to read your wife, her body and soul are a map hidden under lock. You already received the key. Now learn to work with the map.
Lots of love,