A husband might be this person who lives in your same house but never remembers where the things are... But despite the ability to forget where they/we keep the screwdriver or the coffee filters... Or the little pantry full of tissue paper and toothpaste he seems to be oblivious of, a good husband is a treasure to protect.
Many times I joke about silly things my husband do, and other times I'm very harsh with some other men's behaviours. I've come to understand some men are good, some are asses.
Asses are asses probably since the beginning of time. There's no way to succeed in changing a man like that. Some of those asses got worse because they married a nice lady who prefered to stay quiet, obedient, enduring in silence all kinds of gross stuff like been disrespected, hurt, cheated,... A good woman who remains silent leads an ass to continue been a much worse ass.
There's a saying: "Behind a good man, there's a great woman." And I think this is so true! So, if you're lucky enough to have a good guy, let me tell you how to reward him by being your husband's best friend, his wife and his mistress!
1. Men need encouragement too. When you tell your husband how good he's for a certain thing, he feels you tell him he's good. Period. For a man, being told that he's good at doing things, is like a compliment for a nice makeup for us ladies.
2. You married him, but he also needs a reminder of why! Not just that you chose him that time when you said I do, but why you still do choose him every day. A man needs to feel loved. Feeling full of love and accomplished in a relationship makes a very happy husband.
3. Pray for your husband. Thank God for having one of the good boys, for the marvels he brings to your life, for the incredible your days are with him by your side. Beg God for him, for his health, for his heart, for having a fulfilling loving relationship. And also for the right things you need to be his perfect wife.
4. Cheer him up as if you both were still in high school and he was the star player. Be his #1 cheerleader in life. Motivate him, help him. Celebrate his little and big triumphs. Remember when you were flusterring around him at the early stage of your romance? Like bee to the honey you were, aware of those other wandering eyes checking out your piece of babe? Well, sharks keep circulating around, baby girl, right where you catched him, waiting for you to make the mistake of stop doing what you did when he fell in love with you. Don't let him back in the waters by denying him the ego boost her needs from you. Time to use those poom-pooms again!
5. Speak up. when some things go off-track, say it. Remaining silent won't lead to a resolution to anything. Silence has proven to be lethal in a lot of relationships. If you speak up and he listens (and vice-versa) everything can be solved.
6. Flirt with him. Men loves to be seduced. That's part of their nature and by denying this fact, it simply doesn't disappear. Doesn't matter how long you've been together. You will always be the wife. But always be his girlfriend and his mistress. Haven't you noticed that in movies and novels, there's always a flirtatious woman doing pretty eyes, cute smiles, acting all mysterious... Be that flirtatious babe to your husband. Invite him to get some drinks or to a restaurant. Dress your part. Make everybody look at you, but have eyes only for your man! He'll drool all over.
7. Touch him. Humans have different ways to express or feel love. Despite which love language your husband has, he will always want to be touched. Remember, men's nature is more physical. Caress him gently, kiss him without been asked. Hug him from behind when he's busy. Spank him lightly when you pass by him. Been touched= been loved.
8. Make time for the two of you alone. I know this is particularly hard sometimes, but your relationship depends on this. I cannot stress enough about this. Feed kids dinner and put them to bed early. They'll survive! Don't worry if they complain they're not sleepy. They can stay in the room, reading, drawing.
9. Look good. This has nothing to do with vanity but with love. Remember the first time your husband set eyes on you? What were you wearing? How was your hair? How was that makeup? And what about the first date? How excited you were! Remember? How many clothes you left in the room floor until finding your perfect first date look? Aww! I feel the butterflies. That same effort you should put for your husband. And I don't mean daily but every once in a while is good to be received by that first date person.
10. Take the first step. Men loves to feel desired. It makes them feel younger and stronger. Virile. When you make the first move to the sexual encounter, your husband feels so good, so desired and of course, he'll feel so in love with you.
11. Lingerie. As visual creatures, men are aroused by what they see. Be the object of his desires, his eye-candy, his sugar baby, giving him a great visual espectacle every once in a while. Find out what kind of lingerie he would prefer. Is it leather? Lace? Dressing like a dominatrix or an innocent school girl? Maybe Eve's outfit is what he enjoys the most. Stop stressing over stretch marks or cellulite. Even the actresses and top models have some of those.
12. Make him laugh. Even those men with dark sense of humor need a good laugh every now and then. Even the grumpy ones. Laughing help release toxins and also helps to feel better. Sharing jokes with your man is a very intimate thing, even it seems silly.
13. Selfie. No, he doesn't want to see your picture with the duckface. He doesn't care about that. But he'll definitely want to see a great selfie boudoir right in the middle of the day. You don't know how bad this workday is going, and how good a sexy selfie will make him feel in the midst of all the work difficulties.
14. Praise him. Have you noticed how criticizing him family acts towards him? Of course that'll crush him, but you can lift him up by praising him out loud. Say how good he's at something, how supporting he is with you, how much he makes you laugh with his witticism. You cannot control other people's comments, but can certainly diminish its impact by saying greater things of your husband.
15. Don't keep secrets. Besties share every detail, that's why they get along so well. Because they trust each other with everything. Just like two besties, a marriage is in desperate need of honesty. Secrets have no space between two persons who have decided to commit to one another. A little secret in a marriage is like an ink stain in a white shirt. You can try to wash it quickly and it will grow bigger. You can cover it with a blazer, but it still there. It will be discovered eventually. Secrets are the closest cousin of a lie. Don't let that ruin a great team. Share everything.
16. Do things. Does he enjoys watching funny youtube videos or Hitman movies? He likes sports or maybe cooking shows? Make those things one of your date night events. His pick and some food delivery of his choice (or a homemade meal if he likes that better) and he will be captivated.
17. Sex. I cannot think of something men complain the most other than their wives been irresponsive during sex. Pardon my french, my friends! But if they wanted something insensible, a plastic doll or a fleshlight is very cheap in comparison to all the expenses of the house (because believe me, men consider exactly those things... I work so hard to give us this lifestyle and she doesn't even give me head....) Don't blame him for that. Women are not much different. (How much I do for him, clean the house, cook his food, feed the kids, do all the billings, and he cannot even bring me some damned flowers!)
18. Work together for a common goal. Whether it's buying a house or paying a cruise for the Mediterraneum, a couple is happier when both share at least one common goal.
19. Be present for him. Listen when he speaks, even if he's repeating the same story he have told you like hundreds of times. Be by his side in his dark moments. When things go wrong, when people treats him with unfairness. Be always by his side, even when he says he needs to be alone.
20. Stand up for him. We're living in a time when everybody thinks their opinion matters when someone is choosing his/her life partner. I've learned the hard way that family not always wants the best for you, but the best for them. Sometimes, the best for them is keeping you isolated from love because you represent a benefit for them in your current status. In my experience, family not necessarily knows what's best for you. They might love you, but they're not ready to accept your life decision. Don't stress out. Remember they did their family with the partner they chose, no matter what. If they really love you, they'll come to their senses sooner or later. If they don't, well... their loss. Is your time to be happy. Stand up for your partner and make him a priority.
Have you seen the movie "The Other Women"? Those poor three women just focused on one aspect of their womanhood. Brains, wifey material, Boobs! Be all of it for your man and you'll be his girlfriend, his wife and his mistress!
What else you think is needed to be your husband's best friend while being his lover?