Updated: Jul 22, 2020
Hi, my sweeties!
The moment is now. There is no time to waste. Tomorrow may never come. Just remember how it was when you felt like a sexy catwoman on your early 20´s. Oh, so sweet those days! So powerful, invincible... So irresistible! But as there is no time like those days, there is no better time than right now.
The worst part of been honest is... well, telling exactly the truth. But if I didn't, I would be a hypocrite. All those detractors I have gain the last years (Not to say during my entire life), had been fighting against me in vain and I would just be a deception.
Last year was almost over and I couldn’t stand myself. Physically and emotionally I felt overdosed.
I felt heavy and stuffed like Thanksgiving turkey. And believe me, to feel stuffed like that… is just almost impossible. But there I was, hating myself. The little cold of the winter did nothing to me and I started judging myself and inflicting the Polar Bear punishment of living inside a warming blanket- my own skin.
Disappointed and dissatisfied, I found grumbling at myself just because. Why was I feeling so much self hate? Why was I feeling so miserable when I am a very blessed woman who has it all? Why was I frustrated when I have a very happy relationship and two smart, loving and healthy kids I'm so thankful for? Why? Why, when I have been always in support to all body types, the first one to empower woman, the first to tell you to feel free and confident in your own skin?
My husband gave me a huge kiss and hugged me with his strong hot arms. Ah, that is paradise. My happy place. That's when I opened my eyes to reality. I had no reason to feel less, to feel down. I was the same beautiful strong woman that he fell in love with years ago. Regardless of the shape of my body, how much it has changed the last few years, I'm still the same ferocious wolf that he awakened in me.
That day I asked myself why the heck was I feeling so miserable. I confronted myself with my truth. That´s when I noticed I was the one to blame. I had allowed the kids, the family, the chores to take the best of me, and meanwhile, my whole life was full of responsibilities.
All that time I was making myself busier trying to be a perfect mother, a flawless wife. But how was I condemning myself with all that when those I love and care for are always so happy and so full?
I felt miserable not because I was overweight but because I had let myself fall into that trick of life. I was caring for me only if there was time left, never really making the time for me, never prioritizing my own needs. Soon I understood it all. I needed to change quite a few things to have a better healthier 2020.
I was heartbroken and it was my fault. The jealousy I felt of pretty ladies on the TV was overwhelming and for some idiotic reason I felt the urge to compare myself to them. I was so self-conscious that I started feeling a need to compare myself even with porn stars. (Believe me that's the worst possible thing to do.) Don’t get me wrong. I don’t have that type of body, designed under a scalpel, that type of "perfect" is not my perfect skin.
But now I can recognize, I got my moves and I can make that and more so there is no need to feel threatened by such a fake thing.
What did you do? I assume you’re asking now. Easy and hard at the same time. I decided to start loving myself. I was tired of my weight so I started a Keto diet, which is going good so far. This, we will talk about another day. Instead of doing everything for everyone, I started delegating some responsibilities on every member of the household. Kids are big enough to share chores as are big enough to be hours playing videogames. I started letting them do what I usually do for them on daily basis so they understand that what they think is just paperwork or planning family meals with macros and portions is in fact an hour or more of my time invested in our family.
Did I doubted myself? Oh, for sure. Don’t worry, is normal to feel that way. Give yourself a break, after all you are only a human. Start talking positive things to yourself every morning- you’re so smart, your eyes shine, you’re so strong, you’re definitely a hot mamma. Repeat as often as necessary until you believe it. A great thing to release your inner goddess is to give yourself a gift just because. Sexy underwear is a great option. Use it under your work clothes, when going grocery shopping or just to hang around the house. Sexy lingerie has the power to lift your mood and increase your desires. Let your sweet hubby see that you’re wearing a sexy thong or lace underwear, but try to be subtle about it. Remember, you’re trying to boost your confidence, so let him see you and give him candy eyes. Nothing a man loves more than to be gifted with a sneak peak of tonight's dessert!
If you are home alone enjoy a spa, take a long bath, color your hair, take some DIY boudoir selfies, relax with a cup of coffee. Get some sex toys and be the adventurous one by discovering what pleases you. Once you master this, share the tips with your hubby. He’ll be grateful for the sexy anatomy class, and you’ll always be taken care for. The idea here is to make some time for yourself and learn to prioritize your mind, your body and your desires. It is no sin to love yourself. To be the chosen one, you need to choose yourself first!
Now go work with your inner diva!